Today Starts #ACT4MentalHealth Take Action

This is my beautiful daughter, Kelsie, she will be 16 soon. And she has Mental Illness.

Does this look like the face of #mentalillness ???

NO!!

      Mental illness has no Face, it doesn’t affect the poor, illiterate, Hispanic, underprivileged ….it does NOT discriminate!!  Mental illness has No boundaries. No limitations. This is my beautiful baby girl, and yes she struggles and lives w Mental illness every day. The brilliant, beautiful, wealthy, poor, homeless, educated…. Have Mental illness.

And, it’s OK !

     Mental illness is not a choice, is not contagious, does not make u less than. Let Congress know that More help needs to be provided for ppl and those families living w Mental Illness.

Use hashtag #act4mentalhealth starting today, September 4 to, help spread the word.

 

 

This is my son, Zack, 19. He also has Mental illness.

 

How did both of my children end up with Mental Illness?? That is  a good question. One I have yet to figure out. You see Mental illness is usually, not always, genetic. Neither my husband, nor myself have a history or family history of mental illness with the exception of depression. My children however have been burdened with far greater difficulties in addition to depression.

My daughter struggles with severe depression, bipolar disorder and anxiety. Her depression took over her mind, twice, when she could see only darkness, leading to two suicide attempts. Thankfully, she was unsuccessful and medication has helped her to get her life back.

My son suffers from IED, OCD, Tourettes, depression and anxiety as well. He is the one who suffers the most, difficult to treat and hard to  manage. Since birth his illnesses have been present and as a family we have all suffered, struggled and tried to live with his daily outbursts, rage attacks, destruction to our home and lives. My daughter, only recently did the evil problems of mental illness rear its ugly head to reek havoc in her life.

How can you help? How can you take action? Today starts the launch of Act 4 Mental Health by NAMI, the National Alliance on Mental illness.

Check it out. See what it’s all about. Share. Knowledge is Power

Tweet me @kimwhix or Kelsie @n0_boundaries We would love to hear from you

1 in 4, Mental illness is the Devil

 

 

Since my last post, and yes it has been a while. Things have been very chaotic her at the Hix household.

My last post shared information and the story of my sweet daughter and her recent suicide attempt.

Well, here we are again. Another suicide attempt, thankfully not as severe or life threatening as the first.

Her depression, her demons, are finding ways to take over and manipulate her mind and her logic.

As is the case with all mental illness

.kels lookin kool

She is home again, taking each day with bated breath, as do we, her family.

I get angry often. Wouldn’t you?

Why??

Why my child? Why both my children? WHY??

There is no answer, there is no “cure” as is with many illnesses of the physical body. People with Mental illness must learn to live in this limbo, this torture, this uncertainty most of the time, for life. If they are lucky, the proper medications may bring on some mental vacation, a reprieve of some kind, for a while, or maybe a long while .

But, it’s always there.

When will the world wake up?

Mental illness is REAL.

Remember this…….1 in 4

ITs not a character flaw, or the inability to “will” yourself better or logical, or stable.

Comedian, Ruby Wax does a great job explaining this all in her TEDx talk, Whats so funny about Mental illness?

 http://www.ted.com/talks/ruby_wax_what_s_so_funny_about_mental_illness?utm_medium=on.ted.com-static&utm_campaign=&utm_content=awesm-publisher&awesm=on.ted.com_Wax&utm_source=l.facebook.com

If you or a loved on lie with and suffer with a mental illness, please share this informative and funny video. We must educate the world that this is real, it is an ILLNESS and every bit as life threatening as cancer, tumors or other terminal ailments of the body.

Knowledge IS Power

Mental illness Destroys

I am torn.

Truly torn.

What is a parent to do?

There are no good options here for us trying to love 2 children, one with severe mental illness. I have 2 children. I love 2 children.

Mental illness destroys families.

It does it every day.

Mental illness kills dreams.

It does it every day.

Mental illness is NOT fair.

I see that every day.

Mental illness kills people

Every day

My son, now 18, legally and adult, has been plagued with multiple and untreatable mental illness all his life. That, in turn, means our family has lived in almost constant chaos, uncertainty and hell for that entire time as well.  As his parents, my husband and I know we have to care for him, and lovingly do so. When stable he is a sweet, loving, caring boy. Unfortunately the stability never lasts long. His mood swings are constant, his rages frequent, the stress and heartache it causes us all is never-ending. The thing is….it’s not his fault. He can’t help how he acts. And HE hates his behavior and actions worse than anyone.

He is tortured by himself.

We are at the point now that our daughter, his sister, is suffering. Suffering. Struggling. Angry. Resentful.

Angry she doesn’t have a normal brother.

Angry she doesn’t have a normal family.

Angry friends can’t come over because her brother is raging or unstable.

Angry at life.

Angry.

I don’t blame her.

She doesn’t deserve this either.

We are now faced with  “its him or me”

She says….” it’s him or me”

put him out, send him away, call the cops, or I am leaving, she’s had it, we all have.

I can’t blame her.

She deserves peace.

She can’t find it here.

But, where can we send him? He hasn’t broken any laws. He can’t support himself. He is still in school. He is unstable. The hospitals have no beds.

There is no good option.

He is our child, a lovely boy, the real boy is the most loving child you could ever meet. If we can just get him stable. If we can find the right mix of medication. If

If…If…..

But, when unstable,he is someone else. Someone no one likes. Someone who drives everyone away.

It’s not his fault. His mind is the enemy.

Mental illness kills, destroys, leaves a path of destruction.

It’s not fair

** I realize mental illness does not affect all victims this way, this is OUR experience. Many people with mental illness are treated successfully and enjoy life without complications.

Finally, help

12 Twelve

The summer of 2000 was nothing short of chaos!! Zack was on no meds, and his behavior was at an all time worse. I had parted ways with Dr. Y because he did not seem to have my son’s best interests in mind. I was not interested in just getting medication, I truly wanted to know why my son behaved the way he did. I approached the subject of bipolar with him which he did not want to discuss. I pointed out the similarities of my son’s behavior and all of those discussed in the book, and he did not seem interested to what I had to say.

Many in the medical community still dispute that fact that young children can have bipolar disorder. It is a difficult diagnosis to make; some believe it is the current fad diagnosis to make for children with behavioral disorders. I also told him we had decided no more medication, to which he replied “Well, looks like you don’t need me anymore. I won’t schedule a follow up appointment.”

Once again I was more determined than ever to find the person that could help us since it seemed I was not able to find the answers myself. I placed a call to an acquaintance at the psychiatric hospital I was now working at again, however sporadically. I had decided I needed some kind of break from being a full time mom, so I began working PRN, “as needed”, at the hospital, which was approximately three times a month and only on weekends when my husband was home with the children. This would allow me to be up to date on new information, medications, and theories. I knew the Social Worker for the adolescent unit, so I spoke with her. She proved to be so informative, kind and patient while listening to my dilemma, my complaints, problems and frustrations. I asked her for the best child psychiatrist in my town, this is who I had decided would help my son. She recommended two psychiatrists, both in the same practice.

I made a call to the first doctor’s office, and to my dismay he was not accepting any more patients, his case load was full. He did however; refer us to his colleague in his same group. Again, I was on the phone to find out what I could about this doctor, and from everyone I was given a glowing recommendation for him. The appointment was made and the next phase of our journey begins.

Let me first say, I truly believe this doctor has saved us. These may be strong words, but this journey with our son had been so difficult, hopeless and heartbreaking, and this man has been so helpful, kind and understanding. The first visit was approximately 1 1/2 hours long.

I left feeling like the weight of the world had been lifted from my shoulders.  This man gave us hope when we had no hope left. My husband was out of town during this initial visit so I immediately called him to give him the good news; I had found the person that can help us!!! Dr. X asked so many questions about Zack, about us, about our family, something Dr. Y. never did. He actually talked to Zack and I, he sat next to Zack and asked him questions and treated him as a person. Dr. X. was amazed by the medications that had been prescribed to Zack by Dr. Y., telling me he would never prescribe anything until any medical condition was ruled out. I also informed him that I was attempting to help Zack by all natural methods and did not want any pharmaceutical intervention at this time since our experience in the past had been so difficult.

To my amazement he agreed and said he fully supports the all natural alternative if this is what the parents feel is the best choice, and many of his patients did well on this regimen. Again, I was astounded, a doctor who was not opposed to alternative medicine. He began by telling me that there are three medical conditions that “mimic” bipolar disorder, (1) a thyroid condition (2) a streptococcal infection (3) brain injury, or a “hot spot” in the brain.  I will add, that to my knowledge, bipolar disorder has not shown up in anyone in my family or my husband’s family. Having a family member with this disorder is the most common way a person inherits this illness. Dr. X ordered the necessary tests to rule out any of the above medical conditions that might be causing the bipolar/mood swings. All tests came back normal, ruling out any medical cause for his problems. (cont)

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